Lilach Kipnis
Lilach was born on August 9, 1963, in Kibbutz Be'eri, to Avraham and Rena Havron. Avraham, who was born in Germany and came to Jerusalem as a child on the eve of World War II, was one of the founders of Be'eri. On the kibbutz, he was known as a renowned dairy farmer and a pioneer in biological pest control. Rena, born in Tel Aviv, was also one of the founders of Be'eri, who went on to become a writer, an expert about the land, and a teacher. Lilach, their fourth child, was a sister to Dudu, Aviv, and Shoshan. She had a forthright and close relationship with her parents, who were blessed with long lives. She cared for them with deep devotion until their final days.
As a radiant and playful young girl, Lilach made a distinct impression. She was especially alert to others and sensitive to discrimination and inequity. She grew up in the shared accommodations of the time, as a member of the “Kitat Omer", where she formed strong friendships. From her parents’ house she was endowed with a love of science and writing. Additionally, her parents took her for many hiking trips which led to a love of the land, even though she later became less enthusiastic about hiking.
Lilach's intelligence, eloquence, and natural leadership qualities were evident from an early age. When helping the local children, she always tried to overcome social challenges and complexities, which only intensified whenever new children joined the kibbutz. Over time, she became the youth coordinator for the junior high members of the kibbutz. Later, she left the kibbutz for a year of national service, working with youth in the city of Kfar Saba and then, as part of her military service, she transitioned into being a social worker in HaShomer Farm. There she helped rehabilitate and support troubled soldiers, who came from underprivileged families, which led to them being called “the Raful Boys.” “Raful” was a nickname for the Chief of Staff, Rafael Eitan, who happened to be a member of Lilach’s family. Hence, working with that group felt like coming full circle.
After the army, the time for studies had arrived, giving Lilach another opportunity to convey her personality. She earned a bachelor’s degree in social work at the Hebrew University, followed by a master’s degree in art therapy at Ben Gurion University, and then completed a certificate program at the psychotherapy school at Bar Ilan University. While studying in Jerusalem, she engaged in political activity, taking part in the weekly demonstrations at Paris Square that were organized by the “Women in Black” movement, who expressed their stance against violence and against the occupation. At that time, she met Tari (Eviatar) Kipnis. Their souls immediately connected and never separated. Tari, who was born on Kibbutz Ma’agan Michael, was also a student and had been in the Navy. He worked on yachts in those days, and Lilach joined the adventures. That’s how they were able to travel the world, making a good living and living very happily. When they realized that they were meant for each other, they decided to go to Lilach’s kibbutz for a trial year. That year turned into a whole life on Be'eri. The couple’s two children were born there: Yotam and, two years later, Nadav. After six years of working on the kibbutz as the human resources manager at the Beeri printing office, Lilach decided to return to her original profession, social work. Many hundreds of people — including children, teenagers, soldiers, and adults — benefited from her decision. Many of them saw her as a savior of souls, a second mother, and later as a grandmother.
Lilach enjoyed her family and kibbutz life. She loved to bake, host people, be silly sometimes, and also put together a respectable collection of cat figurines. Last August she celebrated her 60th birthday and, as a birthday present to herself, she chose to learn Arabic directly from native speakers: the Bedouins of the neighboring town of Rahat.
At the heart of Lilach’s professional work there was always trauma. She would notice the pain around her and, in response, looked for creative ways to help each person find strength and peace within themselves. She held a deep belief that these complex situations could be treated. In her work, she combined games, movement exercises, and creativity. These methods, which she grew to believe in through her practice, she would even use on herself and her children.
For many people, Lilach was a beacon of light. Even in the densest darkness, she knew how to identify and map out paths that led to the light. Even in the face of hardship and cruelty, she remained a loving and optimistic person. Lilach would always avoid judgement and remain empathetic, keeping the patient's needs at the center of her work.
About two years ago, the children of the Eshkol Regional Council received a special gift: "The Trigger Song." It was a gentle children’s story, told in rhyming verse, and born out of her many meetings with the children of the “Resilience Center,” who live in ongoing states of emergency. Her book was born of the desire not to disregard children’s concerns. Instead, Lilach sought to validate the fears of those children. For the recurring motif of the book, she wrote: “Don’t be afraid, you’re now protected. Everything here is fine. Now you can relax. Slowly let go. Breathe deeply. Drink a little. Choose whatever makes you feel good.”
Lilach is no longer with us, but her book is making its way around the world. It passes among parents, teachers, and educators. It gives much needed support to children all over the country. It is impossible to mistake this effect for anything but a trace of Lilach's warmth, kindness, and wisdom.
In the terrible darkness, Lilach has been an inspiration to all of us. She left behind a voice of clarity and hope, which will never stop.
May her memory be a blessing.
